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Archive for June, 2013

Great Deal: Hobo With a Shotgun on Blu-Ray Only $7

 

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Nightscares (1994)–Oh What a Piece of Crap They Dreamed Up Here

nightscaresThis 1994 movie starring the always hot Elizabeth Hurley absolutely sucks. I like bad movies but someone owes me some freakin’ time back. Oh, and it is also known as “Beyond Bedlam.”

I watched this on Netflix, as it was a recommended watch. I think Netflix might hate me.

The movie (attempts) to tell the story of a Doctor who is injecting a notorious criminal with a new drug that she hopes will cure him of his homicidal ways. It doesn’t and allows him to enter peoples dreams and them to kill themselves.

Yeah…screw that shit.

Don’t watch this, even if you’ve got the biggest crush on Elizabeth Hurley… Don’t watch it.

This movie is so crappy that I can’t even find a trailer for it.


Airplane! (1980)–Say What You Want–This Movie is a Classic

Airplane!So… I re-watched Airplane! for the umpteenth time a couple of nights ago. Yeah, I’ve seen this movie many times… so many times. You know what, though? I am not tired of this movie at all.

The 1980’s brought a lot of terrible things to our society: neon fashions, big hair and country rock. One good thing was Airplane! Starring Robert Hays as ex fighter pilot, Ted Striker suffering from post traumatic stress who now has a terrible fear of flying, who attempts to conquer his fear and hops on a flight that his ex-fiancé is a air hostess, Elaine Dickinson, played by Julie Hagerty aboard the flight that he desperately wants to reconcile with. During the fight,many of the passengers, and the entire flight crew succumb to food poisoning leaving the plane crewless. Despite his post traumatic stress, Striker is forced to take the reigns and get the plane safely down. While this is happening, he is fighting internal Demons, and a air traffic controller that does not believe in him, pressure from all around him and some genuine silliness. The scenes in the control tower are some of the funniest (in my opinion), ever captured on film.

Filled with cheezy lines, puns and just genuinely great, funny and bizarre  from a surprisingly good cast. This is the movie, that for many, is considered the vehicle that launched Leslie Nielsen as a comedy powerhouse (Yeah, I know Police Squad came first). This movie makes me laugh and smile every time I see it. Very loosely based on the 1957 movie Zero Hour! and taking bits from the Airport movies, Airplane! does a great job of parodying the disaster movies of the late 1970’s.

There are two sequels to this movie, which are funny but not as good as the original. If you like this then I say go ahead and watch them, just don’t expect them to be as good – they are not.

Go watch this movie if you haven’t – if you have, go watch it again!

Here’s the trailer:


Logan’s Run (1976) – It May Be Cheezy, But It’s Also Good

loganI don’t knowhow many times I’ve seen the movie, Logan’s Run, but I know it’s more than 10 times. Why do I keep coming back? Must be the charm, because while it’s not a cinematic masterpieces, I find it compelling, and it’s concept interesting.

The story takes place in 2274, and the remains of humanity have been living in a domed, utopian like society, where all parts of living are taken care for you by a computer. Mankind lives for pleasure and there is no more struggle. There is just one trade off, though: You only get to live to the age of 30, and then you must enter “Carrousel” where you have the chance at renewal…though most likely you’ll just end up vaporized. To ensure no one exceeds their allotted 30 years, all humans are implanted with a life clock in their palm – a disk that changes colour as you age, and eventually flashes red when you’ve reached your time to enter carrousel. The majority enters carrousel with no issue, but some choose to run when their time approaches. When that happens, the computer sends a Sandman for you. A Sandman is basically a policeman who is entrusted to capture these Runners.

Michael York plays Logan 5, a Sandman who the computer decides to prematurely age (make his life clock blink, despite having several years left to him. This is done so he can run himself and find the legendary “Sanctuary” – a place spoken of by runners. Sanctuary is supposedly a safe place where you can live out your years past your allotted 30  years. Logan is forced to try to flee, as he is pursued by once fellow Sandmen. As he does he brings along a woman, Jessica (played by Jenny Agutter), who he believes my be sympathetic to runners and may have a clue as to where Sanctuary lies. After a few hairy situations, including a bad plastic surgeon with a young and sexy Farah Fawcett for a nurse and having to convince a group of dissidents that Logan is not a plant, and defeating a weird mirrored robot who’s job has been to process “nutrients from the Sea”, they eventually make it outside the dome, into the wild of the real world. After a few unusual experiences, and noticing that their Life Clocks are now clear, like a baby’s, they eventually find their way to the ruins of a city, Washington D.C. Once there they encounter an old man and his cats, played by the always great Peter Ustinov who tells of his life in the world, explaining how he lived with his birth parents (something quite alien to the dome dwellers). Convincing the old man to follow them, they eventually make their way back to the dome, leaving the old man waiting for them outside. Once in the dome, Logan is captured and interrogated by the central computer. When Logan’s answers cause a break down of the computer, the entire dome starts falling apart. Logan and Jessica lead the people outside where they encounter the old man… Queue credits.

Cheezy on many levels, Logan’s Run is still an important Science Fiction film (and book) that describes a world that some believed was not too far off. Aged, but entertaining, I heartily suggest this a s a watch.

Check out the trailer below:


Southern Comfort (1981)–A Great, Forgotten Film

SouthernComfortThe last time I watched 1981’s Southern Comfort I was 11 and I loved it. Now, there are a lot of things that I loved when I was 11 that I’m not into now – luckily this in one thing that has held up over the years.

Southern Comfort tells the story of a group of Army reservists in the Louisiana National Guard on  weekend exercises in the Bayou’s swamps when they run into trouble with some Cajun’s living in said swamps. The trouble all starts when they decided to steal some canoes they find at a cabin in order to cross the water in order to get to their rendezvous. While making the crossings, they notice on the shore a group of people, most likely the owners of the canoes they are travelling in. One of their members, Private Stuckey (played by Lewis Smith) decides to fire off his M60 full of blanks to scare the Cajuns, as a joke. The Cajuns fire back, striking the squad leader, Staff Sgt. Poole (played by  Peter Coyote), killing him instantly. In in immediate confusion, one of the canoes is tipped over and the map gets lost. The squad’s second in command, Sgt. Casper (played by Les Lannom) takes the leadership role and attempts to lead the group out of the swamp, hoping to find the interstate highway. Sgt. Casper, despite his best attempts is not a natural leader, and manages to get the squad lost, while they are being hunted by the Cajun’s that killed Poole. The group happen upon a trapper’s cabin and take the occupant hostage, believing him to be with the group that killed Poole and is pursuing them. In the trapper’s cabin, they find a store house of guns, ammo and dynamite – all things they can use in their attempt to get out of the swamp… Unfortunately a particularly gung-ho member of the squad, Bowden (played by Alan Autry) destroys the cabin and it’s contents, leaving them without the weapons. The group takes the Cajun prisoner and continue on their trek. Along the way certain members of the group grow more belligerent and aggressive, becoming more and more uncontrollable. Throughout the whole time, two soldiers Spencer and Hardin (played by Keith Caradine and Powers Boothe) manage to keep their heads and wits about themselves, and eventually decide to fend for themselves after Casper proves to be useless and more and more of the group end up dead.

This is a powerful film with good performances from all the actors. It also shows an interesting slice of the Cajun culture. A gritty, great film, I definitely suggest this one as a much watch.

Check out the trailer below:


Jack the Giant Slayer (2013) – Like a Lamborghini With a Lawnmower Engine

Jack_the_Giant_Slayer_posterI was looking forward to 2013’s Jack the Gian Slayer since I saw the trailer in the theatre a number of months ago.

I wish I stuck with the trailer.

Jack the Giant Slayer is a very pretty looking movie – very pretty.

Jack the Giant Slayer is also quite boring.

Looking like a live action film meets the 2007 Beowulf animated film, this film drags most of the way through with dashes of action. Yes, there’s a great giant versus human battle at the end but it’s too little too late.

Jack the Giant Slayer bored me and I won’t forgive that. Should you watch it? I don’t know, are you having trouble sleeping?


Hardware (1990) – Interesting

hardwareI watched 1990’s Hardware back in 1990 and remember it being a weird but interesting sci-fi film with cool music. After re-watching it today, I can safely say my memories of this movie holds up.

Dylan McDermott stars as Moses Baxter, a Space Marine who’s returned from action and picks up some scrap electronics and metal for his artist girlfriend, Jill (played by Stacey Travis) to incorporate in her work. Little do either of them know that included in the pile of scrap is the functioning head of an experimental killer military robot hell bent on destroying everything around it.

Late at night, the head, starts reassembling itself into a killer robot, armed with tools from Jill’s studio. It’s final form is a crazy. deadly, concoction of wires, steel and saw… and violence. Ad to the mix a creepy neighbour that spies on Jill… and falls victim to the robot as well as some secondary characters played by some familiar faces – look for Iggy Pop and Lemmy Killminster, among others, make this film more interesting than one might expect. This is a simple, weird film that has a dated look to it, but carries a coolness. The music is a combination of late 80’s/early 90’s hardcore/metal and back in the day, I kinda’ though the movie was made in order to expose the music – I’m still not convinced this isn’t at least partially true.

It’s all a sort of world has gone to hell and the machines are rising up against us sort of movie and is very confusing, but I still found it interesting. I can easily say that I’ve never seen another movie like it. If you haven’t seen it, or like me haven’t seen it for a long time, then I suggest checking it out.